Thursday, January 31, 2008
Teri Maa Ki!
So. Harbhajan has been acquitted of racism charges, and the scribes at cricinfo have generated tremendous amounts of content over what must have been a non-issue. ICC is going for damage-control, but I consider this a wasted opportunity.
Harbhajan should be fined for being unfunny. Sledging is a part of cricket's glorious history, and has generated many witty anectodes and trivia.
Maybe they can introduce this into the Twenty20 version of the game, where they have special pre-match sledging round. The concept will be similar to the Yo Momma series on MTV and will be aptly called Teri Maa Ki!. To get rid of any ambiguity, both the chosen sledgers will be given mics hooked up to the stadium speakers.
The sledging will not influence the outcome of the match but will generate a compendium of witty anecdotes and comebacks -
Symonds : "Your momma is so stupid, she's proud that you have a bowling average of 130 in this match."
Harbhajan: "You are so ugly, monkeys took offense to our last exchange."
Symonds : "Your dad is so stupid, he thinks a reverse-swinger is a euphemism for faggot."
Harbhajan: "Your momma is so stupid, she thinks googly is a search engine."
The match referee - I nominate Geoff Boycott because he made a lot of my momma jokes himself, would have to judge the best sledger and give him the best Trash-Talker award. The match referee will deduct points for any racist taunts made as they're usually not funny. Like Yo-Momma, the winner will win cash-money.
ICL should seriously consider doing this, now that they're going to be pulverized by IPL.